The Illusions of Darkness
by HMemma546
Summary: Merlin starts to hear voices in his head. He should be on worried, on high alert. Yet he can't...as the voice is...Freya's. DISCONTINUED SORRY
1. A voice of a love one

The Illusions of Darkness

Summary: Merlin starts to hear voices in his head. He should be on worried, on high alert. Yet he can't...as the voice is...Freya's.

_**Hey ya readers those who had read The Lake's Lady (And those who haven't, **_**Ahem _DO SO NOW!) will know at the end of the story I had let you readers decide on the next story I will do while I carry on writing Growth in magic. The choices were The Sun and the Moon(Third made up episode, read The Slave of the Sepasnare and The Fayruz Holder first), Haunted (Ghost OC and Arthur, dunno yet if it'll be slash or not) and The Illusions of Darkness. Yeah I haven't given you lot a lot of time but hardly anyone read my stories with a boring summary to it. But from the look of things already The Illusions of Darkness was a clear winner, Haunted getting a few votes and The Sun and the Moon- zero(were my episodes reallly that bad??!!). So here is my first chapter of The Illusions of Darkness- enjoy!_**

1. A voice of a love one

The dawning sun shone onto the land, waking its people with its bright glow. But in an abandon castle, the resident there is already awake and had her mind set on darkness.

Morgause stood in her candle lit room glazing into her crystal, smirking. Her blonde hair flickered as the dawn light shone onto it, through the window but she didn't take much notice. She was too busy finding out about a certain boy, a boy who had the power of a dragon, a boy who eyes normally innocence blue could flash the fiery gold of the strongest sun, a boy who nature itself had given the gift to- the gift of magic.

She watched the boy follow the man she had tried to get to kill his own father, stumbling and idiotic as she had first seen him. It was hard to see that this simply manservant was anything more especially as she had been more focus on the obvious person of great things, Prince Arthur. Yet now she had realised, he was more powerful than two of her. She had plans for him however.

Merlin will soon fall to her feet.

* * *

"Merlin, how much of an idiot can you get??!!" Arthur scowled as Merlin had tripped up and caused the quarry of the hunt to run _again_.

"I just tripped, Arthur. And plus that raises the question of how much of a prat can _you_ get?" Merlin quirked back as he pulled himself and the equipment up. No wonder he had tripped with everything he had to carry.

"Merlin, if we weren't hunting in the middle of the forest, I would have you either put in the stocks, in the cells or in the dogs' mouths. You do not address your prince like that!"

"Sorry. How-"

"Do not even do that line when you basically say what you just did but add my lord at the end of it. Now _shush_ while I try can find the track for the third time!"

Merlin grinned and Arthur rolled his eyes at him. Arthur wanted to say more but they had only caught about five stoats, two rabbits and a wild chicken. They needed more food.

Merlin groaned as Arthur went over to the tracks of the deer they were chasing. Arthur was probably thinking _we need more food _and Merlin supposed he was right as the harshness of winter were nearing but Arthur didn't _have_ to carry the food and the spears and swords at the same time.

At least Arthur's men hadn't come along on this trip. Merlin didn't mind them but he was kind of edgy with them watching him. It was harder to save the prince's life and not get caught without them.

They soon found the deer again, stopping for a break at the river. It was gulping up the water as it rested. Arthur silently took a cross bow from Merlin and edge closer. Merlin looked away not liking the fact of watching an animal die despite the fact it happened many times already. He focused on the smooth running of the water as he heard Arthur start to pull his string.

"_Merlin._"

The voice made Merlin start, causing to stumble into Arthur and drop his load. Arthur fell forward and the deer ran away.

"Merlin, you really are a total buffoon!" Arthur shouted at him as he lifted himself to a sitting position. His face was covered in mud and he expected his manservant to laugh- quietly after apologising.

"D-didn't you h-hear _that_?" Was the shaky reply. Arthur thought he had said her but Merlin had replaced it with such a quick that that Arthur thought he had just imagined it.

"Hear what??!!" Arthur asked, sighing, "Honestly Merlin, how many times do you have to trip up? Now our quarry's escaped _again_!"Arthur moaned but didn't get a response, not a quirk or even a proper apology. Standing up, he went to give his manservant a raised eyebrow glance but was held by the face Merlin was pulling.

His eyes hadn't left the river but had widened in shock. His face had turned pale- paler than Arthur had ever seen. His usual grin, no matter how big or small it was, had gotten replaced with a hand which it was biting into. The emotion in his eyes was what had Arthur horrified at the most. It was one of pain- a pain Arthur had never seen befall on his manservant- a sense of yearning and grief, glistening with ushered tears.

Arthur stayed there staring at his friend for a moment, an hour, only the gods could tell for how long, his mind whirling with jumbled up thoughts.

A branch, that no longer wanted to stay with its tree, snapped and Merlin jumped to the noise. He blinked and when his eyes opened again the pain had dulled. Merlin turned to the prince, his face turning into confusion by Arthur's expression.

"Sire?" Merlin asked and hearing his voice not broken as his eyes were a moment ago was what brought Arthur to his senses. He shook his head to try and shake of the thoughts as he picked Merlin's load up. He wondered about carrying them himself but Merlin had already started to take the load back.

"Sorry, sire, I didn't mean to drop them again." Merlin said his face pulling a small smirk, "Perhaps it has something to do with my mental affection?"

Hearing that was what made Arthur realise Merlin was hiding something, it was he who would quote the mental affection line. But he didn't want to bring it up in case those eyes appeared again.

Merlin glanced at his reflection in one of the shields to see what his expression was like as the prince hadn't answered to his forced quirk. It was almost back to normal except for the eyes. Merlin blinked again, willing them to return to normal.

"Come on, knowing you, we'll be here all day without managing to even shoot an arrow at our deer." Arthur said at last, calming himself down.

"If we hadn't caught it, I believe it isn't our deer?" Merlin chirped up and as he looked back to the prince, the pain had disappeared at last.

Arthur smiled and he led his friend back to Camelot, forgetting the painful eyes as he entered the gates to the bustling of the town. Merlin kept a step behind his master, trying to forget the voice he heard.

For that voice was one of the person he had recently lost to a curse and a plunge of a sword. Someone who had understood who he really was unlike everyone else in the world. Someone that he had fallen in love with.

_Freya's._

**_Yes, I know the basic plot is obvious but please do tell me in your reviews as who knows what goes on in my story telling if I do get reviews, YOU BETTER REVIEW! Ahem, I mean plz reviews people. Plz._**


	2. Suffering in silence

The Illusions of Darkness

_**Hey, I know, I know, I'm suppose to be writing my next chappie for Growth in magic, I've even got it started but I decided to rest for a wekk or so...um...because**_

**Arthur: _Basically she's lazy._**

**Emma(me):_ Yes because I'm- OY! *whacks Arthur*_**

**Arthur:_ You do know I can get you excuted for that!_**

**Emma:_ Acutally as I am writing you, you're under my control!_**

**Arthur: _Er no, there's that copyright thingy, tell her Merlin- Merlin?_**

**_*Merlin is sitting on the floor by Emma and her bed, asleep*_**

**Emma:_ Merlin is a little bit busy at the moment so Arthur can you just *pushes him out of the door*_**

**Arthur_: Oh dear god..._**

**Merlin: _Yeah this is what would happen if HMemma546 own the series Merlin, through mostly in her imagnation as she's shy when it comes to talking._**

**Arthur:_ HANG ON, you're in there!_**

**Merlin:_ Another thing that would happen, so all the fangirls don't get jealous, she created mupitples of me. It's help me alot when doing all my chores and destiny thing. Oh and er Gwen's got one of me as well_**

**Arthur:_ WHAT?_**

**Merlin:_ For er Merlin/Gwen fans...._**

**Arthur: _Right that it's! *goes back into room* Gwen is mine only! Say the disclaimer!_**

**Emma:_ Okay, Mr green eyed monster....sigh....I somely swear that I do not own Merlin and it's cast. This is just my imagation and humor for my readers. Now please enjoy!_**

**Merlin:_ And review. _**

**Arthur:_ Merlin...why are you standing ever so close to me?_**

**Emma:_ I think that's the gay Merlin!_**

**Arthur:_ HELP!_**

2. Suffering in silence

As they got of their horses in the palace's courtyards, Arthur glanced at his manservant. Merlin had been quiet on the way back through his grin was back on his face. Unless, as Arthur thought, he was scared, Merlin wasn't usually this quiet. Recalling the forest, Arthur frowned a little. What had happened to cause his simple servant so much pain?

But Arthur was soon distracted by a young woman wearing a plain yellow dress but seemed to be more radiant than ever. He smiled softly when he was sure no one- apart from Merlin as already knew about them- was looking at the connection between a royal prince and a simple maid.

"Good afternoon, Guinevere."

Gwen smiled as her eyes fell on the prince, her heart beating fast as she heard his voice say her name. Through they couldn't talk as much as they were in a crowded area she still could talk to him, "Afternoon, sire." Arthur gave her a meaningful stare and she backtracked smiling to herself even more, "Arthur."

Merlin sighed as he watched them. It seem that only Gwen was now allowed to call Arthur by his name, through Merlin called him that anyway, he still receive frowns and had to call him sire most of the time. But Gwen who would generally still call him sire was allowed to not with no frowns. And if Arthur could hear his thoughts, he would moan at Merlin for babbling this nonsense- like Gwen would babble- as he tried to hide his feelings as he watched the pair with just a raise eyebrow knowledgeable smile.

"Bad hunt, all thanks to Merlin over there." Merlin heard Arthur say but just rolled his eyes as he suppose it was his fault this time.

"It's always Merlin fault." Gwen laughed. _Alright, I'm an idiot, now stop going on about it!_

Arthur saw a knight heading towards him. With a groan he realise he could no longer chat with Gwen.

"I'll see you later, Gwen." Arthur said as he saw the knight's expression. Probably a meeting with his dad.

"I'm sure you will." Gwen said with a smile. Arthur grinned and mouth _tonight _at her and she nodded, relieve that he understood her subtleness. Then they both went on their separate ways.

Merlin moaned as the door to Gaius's chambers hit the wall, echoing in his head. Thankful that Gaius wasn't in the room to notice. Merlin rubbed his forehead as he sat himself down onto the bench, massacring his headache. He had developed it on the way back to Camelot, he supposed, but now it was banging loudly. Perhaps it was because he was hoping on something.

"Ah, Merlin, there you are." Gaius said as he entered. Merlin quickly hid the pain from his eyes. He didn't need Gaius fussing over him.

"Let me guess, you need me on deliveries?" Merlin grinned, standing up. He managed to bang the table in front of him, the noise making his head bang again. He tried to not show it.

"No." Gaius said and Merlin looked up. "I need you to fetch me some herbs from the market." Okay, Merlin thought, nothing new then.

"What you'll need?" Merlin asked, trying to look raring to go. Through Gaius went through the list, he wasn't fooled.

"You're alright, Merlin?" The old man asked as Merlin went to the door, trying to hide his winces.

"Fine," Merlin said perhaps a little too quickly. But he didn't stop to look at the disbelieving look on Gaius' face, knowing he would cave in if he did.

Gaius watched his ward leave, feeling an anxious feeling in his stomach through he couldn't tell why.

After fetching the herbs for Gaius, Merlin headed to Arthur's chambers. Arthur was sitting on the window seat, glazing out as he came in.

"Ah, Merlin," Arthur turned and Merlin wince at the sudden movement throbbed in his head, "I need you to help me."

"Okay....you're asking me for help?"

"The world's a small place, Merlin, no need to rub it in. Anyway, I need you to help me bail me out while I go see Gwen tonight; I'm supposed to dine with my father tonight."

Merlin smile became through gritted teeth, "This sounds a whole like what happen with Sophia."

Arthur sighed as he scratched his head a little. He barely remembered anything that happened then.

"You know this means I'll be in the stocks?" Merlin tried. It had been ages since he had been in them and he would like to keep it that way.

"I'm sure the stocks miss you very much, Merlin, but don't get excited as I've got a lie straighten out. All you have to do is repeat it and then come by Gwen's house and make sure no one disturbs us."

"You're going to cook this time?" Merlin smirked and received one of the window seat's pillows to his head, not helping his headache at all. Arthur however didn't notice.

"Please?" Arthur tried and Merlin sighed. He supposed it would be okay but he wasn't sure he would easy lie with a headache on top his lack of deception skills.

Arthur smiled at Merlin and let him get on with his chores while he went to finish of his training.

Once the door was shut, Merlin let the grin fall that he had always manage to keep on his face even when no one was about as he went back to massacring his headache and let his sadness wash over him a little.

Through Merlin hid it well, he still felt his heart throb when he watched Arthur and Gwen caught in their love world. He hid his grief well but sometimes he had to bit his lip and look away from them. Apart from their status, they had noting standing in the way of their love.

"_Merlin_"

Luckily, Merlin wasn't carrying anything for he would have dropped them again. But instead of the pain washing over him, it was relief. Freya's voice seem to dull his headache and now he knew that he hadn't been imagining her at the stream. It calmed him a little just to hear her again.

He smiled as he went back to his chores with more hope than ever. Even if he was going to be pelted with fruit and be stuck with a headache, he wouldn't mind as long as he heard Freya voice.

_**This chapter was a little short as I wasn't sure what to write with Gwen and Arthur. It'll get longer I'm sure! Please Review!**_


	3. Blinded

The Illusions of Darkness

_**Okay, this is a little longer but not much as I was really stuck on this chappie. You see my ideas are jumping ahead of my story so I'm properly on chapter 5 or more depending if the ideas that had been passed turn up.**_

**Arthur: **_**Get on with the story, will ya??!!**_

**Emma(me): **_**Huh? Why are you so grumpy today? **_

**Merlin:**_** Is because your gay Merlin is trying to...um....hit on him, he's trying to get Gwen's Merlin to back of Gwen, Your Merlin is annoying him by saying how your great and everything,**_

**Emma:**_** *giggles and blush at last line***_

**Merlin:**_** Evil Merlin is trying to kill him,**_

**Emma:**_** I wonder why I made that mutipile anyway?**_

**Merlin:**_** Yeah me to, and he's annoyed as I have no idea if I'm the real Merlin or another copy thing.**_

**Arthur:**_** I surronded by Merlins and none of them are the real Merlin! Wouldn't that annoy any one??!!**_

**Fangirls and Emma:**_** If that means there plenty of Merlins to go around....no**_

**Arthur:**_** Arrgh!**_

**Emma:**_** Calm down, we'll find the real Merlin. In the meantime, I'll create mutiplies of you for the Arthur fans**_

**Arthur:**_** WHAT!**_

**Emma:**_** Oops, did I say that out loud? Roll chappie why I deal with angry Arthur here!**_

3. Blinded

Arthur entered his chambers, grinning to himself. Merlin- who was just finished washing of the rotten leftovers of him- sighed a little as he rolled his eyes and smirked at his master.

"Honestly, Merlin, you can't lie for anything, can you?" Arthur pretended to jab as he tried to hide his grin.

Merlin hesitated then; he couldn't really response. _Oh, actually I do lie a lot, Arthur, I've magic, I have lost a lost one, I've poison Morgana and lost my blood line father. _If Merlin wanted to be executed tomorrow he would have told Arthur just that, he thought as his headache throbbed louder than ever.

It had been doing that for the rest of the day, making him feel tired and annoyed. He tried to just hide it behind his normal self but he still had to stop for a few seconds as the pain throbbed through him, making him go blind and dizzy, sometimes. He had done well at hiding it from Gaius, who had passed him a little often than usual and he hoped he could hide it from Arthur; he didn't really want a fuss.

Arthur didn't notice his manservant's behaviour.

"I gave you a lie and you still manage to mess up! It's lucky that no one recognised the blue cloak as me...." Arthur voice trailed a little as he thought about the dinner with Gwen.

"Yeah, I think pelting me made them not be able to see the cloak person-obviously-the-prince sneaking into a maid's home." Merlin smirked.

Arthur sat down, heavily in his chair causing a harsh sound. Merlin winced. Unfortunately, he had chosen the time to pour Arthur a drink, spilling some of it.

"Merlin!" Arthur moaned but was in a good mood so he didn't complain or notice Merlin's wince.

"Sorry! So....how was the dinner with Gwen? Don't tell me you cook it this time."

"Oy, so I've never been taught how to cook! I'm surprised that you can cook something's."

"One of my many gifts," Merlin said as he leaned on the table, facing Arthur.

"Yeah, well, besides being an idiot, I'm sure they're your only gifts, Merlin, unless you're thinking something I really don't want to think about." If Arthur wasn't a prince, Merlin would've lightly punched him. "No, I didn't cook, Gwen did. We just chatted to each other, really."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah and you wearing a fool expression and your cheeks are red because?"

Arthur immediately felt his cheeks and groaned as he felt the hotness boiling of them. He didn't bother checking his expression; he knew if his manservant had pointed it out it was true.

He glanced back at Merlin who was eagerly waiting....and distracting himself from something. Arthur thoughts almost turned to confusion; what from? But he was too happy about Gwen to notice.

"Okay....you know what I said whilst we were searching for her? I...I confessed what I said to her."

"Really? Even the bit when you said you wanted to marry-" A sharp kick in his leg told Merlin not to carry on that sentence.

"I didn't even say that, I said that if my father wouldn't let me rescue _a _servant then he wouldn't let me marry one." Arthur spat a little too quickly. Trying to long out the 'a' also didn't at all help in convincing Merlin, "No, I didn't tell her that, okay?"

"Just everything else?" Merlin asked, grinning even more. Arthur would have loved to just get of this subject now but he knew it would take some time before Merlin would let him try to change the subject. He nodded and Merlin grin became so wide, it became one of his goofy smiles.

"Stop being a girl, Merlin. Next thing you know, you be jumping up and down, clapping like Morgana does,"

As soon as Arthur's step sister was mention, both men's faces fell as they both wondered if she was okay. Merlin glanced at the table to hide the guilt and sadness in his eyes.

"Gwen also said I was a great person that would become a great king...." Arthur quickly got back to the subject; he was never one to show his feelings, even for a moment, "Basically, I think that was what she had also said when I was unconscious by the Questing Beast." His face had become a little pink through he said it off-handily. "And that she hoped to be by my side when it happened."

"Seems you're not the only one who's thinking of proposing," Merlin smirked and Arthur who had started drinking from the goblet that Merlin had set on the table, nearly spat it at him.

"Merlin....shouldn't you be doing some chores?" Arthur gestured to the chambers around him basically saying; _you've embarrassed me too much...Get to work!_

Merlin shook his head, "I've done, in case you've not noticed."

Arthur stared around the room. The chambers were neatly tidied, the armour cleaned, the bed made, floor clean, shoes done, clothes folded and put away, "What, even walked the dogs?"

Merlin nodded. He had managed to do that just before ending into the stocks. For some reason, he didn't find anything hard or to moan at after everything, he was too distracted to even notice what he was doing at best of times.

Now, if Arthur wasn't a love sick prat like he is at the moment, he would've noticed this wasn't Merlin's behaviour. But even the painful eyes had vanished from his memory.

"Wow, I'm impressed, Merlin. Now, you don't have an excuse for not being able to do your work." Arthur eyes had widened in his arrogant way and Merlin regretted doing his work now. "Well, if you're done, you probably can go now."

Merlin smirked as he knew that Arthur was trying hard to avoid the rest of the conversation, "Alright, we can carry on with this conversation tomorrow, then. Night, sire," And Merlin left before Arthur could refused.

Now, he really hoped that his father would call him up for a meeting tomorrow morning if it meant avoiding Merlin.

Gaius looked up as soon as Merlin came in. It was earlier than usual and although Merlin had his usual smile, Gaius couldn't press down his worried feeling. In fact he had passed his ward a couple of times on purpose, checking on him. Through he seemed fine and maybe Gaius old age was playing up with his eyes, but he thought he saw something in Merlin's eyes, like pain.

"I heard you've got pelted by vegetables today," Gaius merely said, not sure on what to say otherwise.

Merlin nodded as he rake his hand through his raven hair, though he could also be subtly rubbing his forehead, Gaius thought with a small frown, "Yeah, well the lie Arthur set out for me, didn't really work well,"

"What do you mean?" Gaius said as he set down the dinner and sat down.

"Gwen wanted him to join him for dinner, tonight," Merlin smirked and Gaius too shared a smile. It seemed that the two were beginning to fall under the spells of love and Gaius was happy that after many years of watching the boy grow up, Arthur had finally begun his first proper steps into adulthood. While many girls were just mere crushes, Gwen seemed more.

"It went well; through Arthur is a little embarrassed to dish out all the details. I'm surprised; he usually doesn't shut up if he's got something good to talk about."

"Merlin?" Gaius asked as his ward didn't join him at the table but carried on walking to his room. Merlin turned, his face confused, "Aren't you going to eat something?"

"Oh, well, I'm not really hungry," Merlin bit his lip as he knew that with their lower status food wasn't meant to be wasted and he didn't want Gaius to go of into a lecture about it, "And being pelted with leftover food does put you of your appetite."

Gaius frowned. Merlin wasn't the one to refuse the food that they've got, especially after the whole dragon incident. Merlin just shrugged and opened the door to his room before Gaius could firmly get him to sit down. This cause the door to bang loudly on the wall, causing Merlin to automatically wince.

Gaius watched him go in and shut the door, concerned. Perhaps Arthur hadn't noticed anything different about his manservant but Gaius wasn't blind.

**_Review please! In the next chappie A/N I'll be trying to find the real Merlin- I mean the BBC Merlin._**

**Old *Sherk version* Merlin: _Oh and I really wanted to show up somewhere...._**

**Emma: _Go back to home, you know Faraway,_**

**Old Merlin: _Actually, I live faraway from Faraway, I just use my magic-_**

**Emma: _Which made Donkey and Puss swope bodies as Young Merlin does magic much better than you!_**

**Old Merlin: _which made donkey and Puss swope bodies as Young Merlin does magic much better- OY!_**


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